This is a "friend's" interpretation of my home life. In case you can't read the dialog, my cat Seamus and I (that's me with the Canadian flag where my head should be) are having the following discussion:
Flaghead: What would you like for dinner, Seamus? Seamus: Scotch! Flaghead: But that's my scotch, you little devil, and I don't think that's very healthy for cats. Seamus: Scotch! Flaghead: (thinking) I wonder if Seamus has a drinking problem? Seamus: (thinking) When did Mary become such a moralizing bitch?